The BUCKET unites us. The BUCKET is truth.

Cunto! has been playing a proprietary game called BUCKET WARS at parties for years, now — for the first time ever — we’re bringing it to the public. Saturday January 26 at the Buzz Mill, Cunto! will play a set [8pm] then host a 32-person bracket of BUCKET WARS [9pm]. The winner will receive $100 worth of scratch offs and gift cards, plus a bucket-load of sick Buzz Mill swag. The show and the tournament are FREE.

Here’s how to play BUCKET WARS: two competitors stand on buckets 15ft apart holding 40ft of rope. When the whistle blows, you begin pulling the rope. Once the rope gets tight, the match becomes a cunning battle of wits to knock your opponent off of their bucket or make them run out of rope. When they pull hard, you loosen your grip to send them falling backwards. When they grip down to pull in more rope, yank them off their bucket and into hell. Balance and cleverness often wins out over strength and size.

If you want secure a spot in the bracket, send Cunto! a Facebook Message, instagram DM, or tell us that you want to participate in the comments on the event page. We will also be signing up participants at the event, but folks who signed up in advance will get preference. No one has ever gotten injured playing the BUCKET GAME, but we’re still gonna make everyone sign a waiver anyway so you can’t sue Cunto! Corp.